Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens.

Because I'm always in the foulest mood when I'm working, here's a stream-of-consciousness list of things that I can't stand. Some of these items are behaviors I myself am guilty of because, while everyone is a hypocrite, I'm at least a self-aware one.

1. Answering a yes or no question with something other than yes or no
2. Using "irregardless" instead of "regardless"
3. Almost all young people
4. Self-righteous know-it-alls
5. People who intentionally try and act "cool"
6. Tomatoes
7. People who refer to all heavy metal that's not crappy, mainstream American metal like Slipknot as death metal.
8. Greedo shooting first
9. Dayton, Ohio
10. The naively optimistic
11. Smug idealists
12. Smugness in general
13. Crabcore
14. Ayn Rand
15. Facebook status updates that are obvious attempts to get compliments, undeserved sympathy or attention
16. People who respond to those status updates with compliments, undeserved sympathy or attention
17. Political Correctness
18. Vaguebooking
19. Comma abuse
20. When someone asks your opinion and gets mad when it's not what they wanted to hear
21. The Kardashians
22. Intentional non-conformity
23. Mediocre art and the people who like it
24. Sparkly vampires
25. l337 speak and internet jargon
26. The band Rush
27. Rush Limbaugh
28. All conservative media personalities
29. Some progressive media personalities
30. The state of modern American journalism
31. That period in a couples relationship when they move from dating to exclusivity and they're always kissing in front of everyone and being all sappy and gross all the time.
32. Not having enough time in the day
33. My job
34. When stuff I like gets popular and as a result watered down or beaten to death
35. Dane Cook
36. Reality deniers
37. Puritanical moralists
38. Jam bands
39. Preaching to the choir
40. People who endlessly complain about things they can't change
41. People who endlessly complain about things they can change but don't try to change
42. People who make decisions which are clearly stupid to everyone else, then moan about how stupid the decision was and expect to be placated
43. Dogmatism
44. Not having control over my own life
45. The existential angst that inevitably results from trying to find your place in an increasingly shallow, consumer-driven and digitized world
46. Speaker phone!!!
47. Glorification of ignorance
48. Bad drivers
49. When someone asks a question with the sole intention of starting an argument
50. Mushrooms